BUMPER STICKERS

I THOUGHT I WAS INDECISIVE, NOW I'M NOT SURE

STABLE RELATIONSHIPS ARE FOR HORSES.

JUST SAY NO TO NEGATIVITY

SQUIRRLES, NATURE'S SPEED BUMPS

EXCESS IS NEVER TOO MUCH IN MODERATION

TO ERR IS HUMAN, TO MOO ES BOVINE

SO MANY STUPID PEOPLE, AND SO FEW ASTEROIDS

NEVER BELIEVE GENERALIZATIONS

JESUS US COMING. LOOK BUSY!

JESUS LOVES YOU. BUT I'M HIS FAVORITE!

WHENEVER I FEEL BLUE, I START BREATHING AGAIN

EVERYTIME YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH, AN IDIOT STARTS TALKING

PEOPLE LIKE YOU ARE THE REASON THAT PEOPLE LIKE ME NEED MEDICATION

SAVE THE TREES, WIPE YOUR BUTT WTH AN OWL

THE LAST THING I WANT TO DO IS HURT YOU, BUT IT'S STILL ON THE LIST

PROCASTINATE NOW

REHAB IS FOR QUITTERS

SARCASM IS ONE MORE SERVICE I OFFER

GOD MADE US BROTHERS, PROZAC MADE US FRIENDS

MY MOTHER IS A TRAVEL AGENT FOR GUILT TRIPS

BEER: IS NOT JUST FOR BREAKFAST ANYMORE

CONSTIPATION CAUSES PEOPLE NOT TO GIVE A CRAP

THERE ARE 10 TIPES OF PEOPLE IN THE WORLD. THOSE WHO UNDERSTAND BINARY, AND THOSE WHO DON'T

WOMEN WHO SEEK TO BE EQUAL WITH MEN LACK AMBITION